Tuesday, July 21, 2009

How, How, How... did ZZ Top do on Monday Night RAW?

After Orton issued a handicapped Tag Team match of Legacy versus John Cena and Triple H - the WWE Universe were introduced to ZZ Top, Dusty Hill and Billy Gibbons.

Huge fans of the WWE, they once recorded an entrance theme for Nicholas "Wild Thing" Bauer - at Stone Cold Steve Austin's request; they are the first ever co-hosts of Monday Night RAW and were ecstatic to be running the show tonight.

Santino Marella arrived on the scene calling them "Zzzzzzz Top!" and switching their first names - Dusty Gibbons and Billy Hill; but still claiming to be a huge fan of theirs. In honor of his "devotion," Hill fitted Santino with an honorary chest-length, ZZ Top signature, beard, and a pair of "Cheap Sunglasses" to complete the trio for tonight. Santino looked more like a Muppet from Sesame Street - with an oversized beard and shades - quite comedic.

It was also nice of ZZ Top to let Santino play - even if it was air guitar... with an actual guitar.

After the Big Show proved his dominance in the after match of the six man tag team match - ZZ Top plugged in their summer tour with Aerosmith - how did we not see that one coming...

When ZZ Top almost proved to be completely worthless, Jericho showed up to meet the icons of Rock n' Roll and requested a jamming session - seeing as he is the lead singer of his rock band, Fozzy.

Hill and Gibbons had no idea who Fozzy were, but they did know that they wanted Chris Jericho to face off against "The World's Strongest Man" Mark Henry. And when asked "How?" The Trio started playing "La Grange" in response to Jericho's "How, how, how."

If one match were not enough to prove their status as hosts - ZZ Top outsmarted Chavo Guerrero into accepting another match against Hornswoggle in a "Sharp Dressed Man" match - how interesting that the match also so happens to be the title to one of their smash hits! Do we see a pattern forming here?

And lets not forget their other hit single, "Legs" featuring the Divas of Monday Night RAW: Kelly Kelly, Alicia Fox, Gail Kim, Rosa Mendes, and Santino? The music was all a blair until Santino showed off his legs, in which the music cut - That's when ZZ Top decided to cut out. As a farewell to the whole ZZ Top gimmick - the Divas then contested in a ZZ Top "Legs" tag team match.

And it would not be complete without ZZ Top riding into the arena in, non other than, the red 1933 Ford 3-window coupe hot rod "The Eliminator."

I will go on to say that ZZ Top really had no business hosting Monday Night RAW, just like Seth Green, it's all a gimmick to plug their own projects. At least Seth made matches throughout the night - ZZ Top made two matches and played music the whole time. If it were not for Santino Marella jamming alongside them in a ZZ Top makeover - the whole ZZ Top angle would have been a total flop.

Note: Next Monday's Host will be - Shaquille O'Neal!

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